Journaling Prompts for Understanding Jealousy and Envy
Jealousy and envy are among the emotions people are most ashamed of, and therefore most likely to leave unexamined. But like most difficult emotions, they're pointing at something real. Envy tells you what you want. Jealousy tells you what you fear losing. Neither makes you a bad person—they make you a person. Writing about these feelings, without immediately trying to get rid of them, can reveal important information about your desires, your fears, and what you believe about whether you're allowed to have the things you actually want.
Journaling Prompts
Who are you most envious of right now, and what specifically do they have that you want? Try to name the exact thing—is it their freedom, their relationship, their confidence, their recognition, something else?
What does this envy tell you about what you want? Not what you think you should want, or what would look good—what do you actually want for your own life?
Is there a belief underneath the envy that suggests you can't or shouldn't have that thing? What is that belief, and where did it come from?
In a relationship context: when do you feel most jealous, and what specifically does it trigger? Is the jealousy about the current situation, or about something older?
What would it mean to take the information in your envy seriously—to let it point you toward something rather than just sitting with the discomfort of it?